WEEK 6

Coming soon

WEEK 5

Any sharps who make a living betting on college football deserve a Nobel Prize in mathematics. Consider the last three weeks.

Week Three: #8 Ole Miss upsets #7 LSU.

Week Four: #21 Florida beats the Rebel out of #4 Ole Miss, 52-28.

Week Five: #25 Missouri, fresh off a loss to Mississippi State, trounces #8 Florida, 45-17.

Are we living in the golden age of college football parity? Or is this sport just stupid?

Whatever the answer, we have a resident sharp in our midst.

CircleCityAndy.

Thirty-five entries. Thirty-four picked Florida. Andy from Indianapolis (I’m presuming there aren’t any other cities out there clamoring for the nickname “Circle City”) picked Missouri. Nobel committee, take note.

But amidst all that chaos, there was the return of the machine: Alabama.

14 points in the first quarter.

14 in the second.

14 in the third.

14 in the fourth.

Alabama 56. #16 Mississippi State (that same team that just beat Missouri and South Carolina) 23.

And remember last week when we discovered God was a MAC fan? Turns out God just hates Michigan.

One week after Iowa silenced the Big House at 0:00, the Wolverines went to Minneapolis and lost to Minnesota 20-14. Michigan hadn't lost to the Gophers in Minneapolis since 1977. I was negative 10 years old, a stat that gives me only more respect for the three of you who had the balls to pick Minnesota. Your bravery paid off. 

We should have seen it, though. Never bet against a coach willing to smear his own player's blood across his face. Row the boat!

Around the rest of the OTC slate, Iowa State survived West Virginia 45-42 behind running back Aiden Flora, who rushed for 212 yards and three touchdowns while also going 2-for-2 passing for 48 yards and two more scores. Five total touchdowns from a running back. 

Ohio State welcomed Iowa back to reality after last week’s euphoria with a 31-14 win at Kinnick. Kentucky survived South Carolina 35-34 in overtime. Florida State beat Virginia 38-7 as dogs. BYU is making a play for my heart yet again, remaining undefeated with a 17-10 win at TCU (despite Bear Bachmeier throwing for 62 yards). Winning is winning...

Baylor entered Tempe as a 3.5-point underdog and beat Arizona State 55-19. Vegas missed that one by 39.5 points. And Arizona demolished Cincinnati 34-7, with the Bearcats heroically scoring their first points with two minutes left to avoid the shutout.

In OTC, our resident Missouri savant CircleCityAndy rode his lone-wolf pick to a 7-3 record and 43 points, earning the Week Five crown.Three points behind him was THE (presumably a nod to The Ohio State University, or maybe just a fan of definite articles).

Atop the overall standings, PickleRicks RicklePicks continues to own both the best name and the best score at 210 points. 404NoPointsFound sits 13 back at 197, while Kybow Picks and WahooWa are tied for third at 196.

And then there's Chase's 1st Entry. Nine points. Single digits. I am praying that our boy simply forgot to submit 9 of his 10 picks. If he didn’t I need his Week 6 selections ASAP so I can fade the shit out of every single one.

And somehow Chase isn't even in last place. Diamond Dave's 1st Entry continues to hold that honor with 110 points. Dave scored 10 last week. Chase scored 9 this week. Who is going to continue the race to the bottom with 8? We won’t know until next Sunday. Week Six awaits. Think you’re slick? Make that pick!

                        VEGAS

#7 Alabama (-5.5) @ #16 Mississippi State

West Virginia @ Iowa State (-3.5)

Michigan (-5.5) @ Minnesota

#8 Florida (-5.5) @ #25 Missouri

Virginia (-2.5) @ Florida State

#5 Ohio State (-14.5) @ #14 Iowa

#24 Kentucky @ South Carolina (-3)

#10 BYU (-6.5) @ TCU

Baylor @ Arizona State (-3.5)

Cincinnati @ Arizona (-6.5)

WEEK 4

Well, well, well. Who would have thought God was a MAC fan?

That is the only plausible explanation for what occurred in Ann Arbor Saturday afternoon, as the football gods reached down and tilted the scales of justice against the maize and blue. In their fourth straight home game, big blue found themselves on the Western Michigan side of an unthinkably improbable (though in this case legitimate) comeback. 

As Reece Vander Zee silenced 100k+ with the clock reading 0:00 (for real), I half expected the confused Wolverine fans to charge the field. Congrats to the seven of you brave enough to pick the Hawkeyes.

I’ll admit, I spent the entire week flummoxed by the Rebels v. Gators spread. #4 Ole Miss, fresh off one of the most anticipated games of the season (decade?, century?, history?) a 4.5-point underdog against #21 Florida? What?

And then I read a life-changing stat. Prior to Saturday, an AP Top 5 team had been an underdog against a team ranked outside the Top 20 just four times since 1978. Those teams were 0-4. After Saturday, make it 0-5. And it wasn’t even close. Florida 52. Ole Miss 28.

Vegas was giving us the closest thing to sure money outside a U.S. treasury bond. The easiest investment strategy in America was simply to wager your entire net worth on Florida.

Sadly, I’m a wuss. Enjoy a state school, kiddos.

Meanwhile, those vanquished LSU Tigers? Steamrolled #23 A&M 35-6. 

This sport has the memory of a goldfish.

Out west, with all due respect to former PAC fans, things got UGLY in LA.

Oregon quarterback Dante Moore gave himself up on a slide when USC linebacker Desman Stephens came flying in late and drilled him in the head. In the words of Dan Lanning, “Disgusting.” It made for a scary moment, with Moore immobilized and taken from the Coliseum via ambulance. Stephens was ejected (and subsequently suspended) for the infraction. And then, the Ducks flew together.

Enter Dylan Raiola. The same Dylan Raiola whose 2025 season ended when he broke his leg in this exact stadium. 289 yards and two touchdowns later: Oregon 41. USC 27.

First loss of the season for the Trojans.

In Rocky Top, #1 Texas survived #14 Tennessee 20-17 in the battle of orange in front of POTUS himself. Trump's attendance became a storyline before the game after Texas coach Steve Sarkisian said the president's movements at last year's national championship had caused interference with sideline communications. Little did we know why Indiana went so red in the last presidential election.

Naturally, during the first quarter Saturday, ESPN explained on air how Trump's presence could potentially cause communication issues inside Neyland Stadium.

And then ESPN's own audio stopped working. Static. Garbled microphones. Chris Fowler eventually telling Kirk Herbstreit to stop talking while they tried to fix it. Somewhere a secret service agent chuckled.

Back east, though not on the pick ‘em slate, we can’t miss the opportunity to commend Penn State on their 17-0 lead against Wisconsin at home. 

They lost 24-20. And James Franklin isn't even there anymore. Sorry, I couldn’t help myself.

Moving on.

Around the rest of the OTC slate, Boise State suffocated Western Michigan 32-7, holding the Broncos to 2-for-14 on third down and 0-for-3 on fourth. The Cornhuskers handled Michigan State 31-13 to move to 4-0, inspiring early season hope yet again.

JMU beat Old Dominion 46-20, now also 4-0. Darling status: increasingly official. Cincinnati was a six-point dog against Kansas State and won the game outright, 31-26. Oklahoma State lassoed West Virginia 41-24 while piling up 609 yards of offense. The Cowboys might just be back. And Mississippi State beat #19 Mizzou 31-24.

In OTC, Knightro Express nearly achieved perfection. 53 of 55 points. One pick away. That one loss? Michigan. Ouch. Respectable nonetheless. The next-best score on the week was 45.

PickleRicks RicklePicks continues to own both the best name and the top of the leaderboard with 180 points. Duane's 1st Entry sits ten points back at 170. His second entry remains off the leaderboard entirely. WahooWa is hot on his heels at 169.

And then there's Diamond Dave's 1st Entry in Week Four. 10 points. TEN. Last week's Stinker scored 16 and we treated it like a crime against humanity. Dave saw that and said hold my beer.

Ten games. Fifty-five possible points. Ten earned. A complete, unflushed turd of a week.

Please don’t be a Dave in Week 5.

Next week boasts Bama @ Miss State, Ohio State @ Iowa, Florida @ Missouri, and… Notre Dame @ UNC. The Marcus Freeman / Bill Belichick contrast couldn’t intrigue me more.

Saddle up, gents. Think you’re slick? Make that pick!

Prayers for Dante 🙏🏻

(That shit was beyond unacceptable)

                    VEGAS

#1 Texas (-4.5) @ #14 Tennessee

#4 Ole Miss @ #21 Florida (-4.5)

#17 Iowa @ #20 Michigan (-4.5)

Boise State (-8.5) @ Western Michigan

Nebraska (-6) @ Michigan State

JMU (-7) @ ODU

Kansas State (-6) @ Cincinnati

Oklahoma State @ West Virginia (-1.5)

#20 Oregon (-3.5) @ #12 USC

#19 Missouri @ #24 Mississippi State (-3.5)